Coupons Available for Luxor Vegas: $5 off up to four people at the Bodies and Titanic exhibits. (Click Here For More Info.)

Room Quality: The rooms in the pyramid are cool because of the slanted windows, and you get to ride the inclinator up to them. Plus, you get to bump your head on the window every time you try to look out. They are average sized (actually a little larger, but you lose some space because of the slanted wall). The rooms in the non-pyramid towers are less exotic in shape, but they are larger, nicer and have tubs and separate showers. The twin queens have separate soaking tubs and showers. The towers are also a slightly longer walk to the casino. Rooms have hairdryers and irons. Pyramid mini-suites cost more, but you can relax in your own bubbling Jacuzzi tub. Now, that's romantic!

Service Quality: Fair. This is one of the biggest hotels in the world, so they've seen every request you can imagine. Except some of ours involving Sit'n'Spin, vacuums and a goat. If it's a busy weekend, the wait can be long for extra towels or more soap. Like most large places, check-in can be a long and boring wait. Room service is good.

What You Get Bottles of in the Bathroom: Shampoo, conditioner and lotion, possibly more. It's standard for a big, fancy hotel. You also get nice, fluffy towels but you're not supposed to keep those (wink, wink). The mini-suites do it up right with fancier shampoos, bath salts, gels, ex-foliants and nicer lotion.

Clientele: Young to middle-aged. This place doesn't draw the big high-rollers, but you will see plenty of people betting big sums of money.

How's the Pool? It's pretty good, with a decent pyramid theme with palm trees. In the winter the Luxor pool may be closed, in which case they will send you next door to the Excalibur (not to Mandalay Bay).

Resort Fee: (What is this?) $16.80 per night. You get high-speed internet, fitness center access, local and long distance calls and daily paper.

Table Games: Lots of games, including the regulars. The casino is sort of confusing to get around, but it's a pleasant place to play if you've got the money.

Bet Minimums: $10 to $15 most of the time for tables, but if it's a hopping time, like a Saturday night, you can expect to see that go up more. Craps is likely $10 with 3x4x5x odds. Roulette is $1 chips with a $10 min. If you like single-zero roulette, you can get into it for $25 minimum.

Machines: Nickels to $100, with just about every variety of game you can imagine. They have lots of those crazy, multi-line nickel machines that are so popular. For the most part, we have heard the slots are tight, and there is very little full-pay video poker.

Cocktails? Good. You can get drunk enough to demand to see Nefertiti's titis if you tip the cocktail waitresses well. Nickel players tend to be ignored, so if you play the nickels, be vocal.

Who Gets Comps? The M Life club serves for all MGM Mirage Properties. Go big and be loyal to have your room taken care of.

Backstage Deli: If it looks like a deli, quacks like a deli, it must be a deli. And this one sure is.

Burger Bar: It's a fancy burger place where you build your own burger to specs, which includes Black Angus or Kobe beef and top it with salmon or lobster. Don't worry, you can make a regular old burger, too, but if you want something really goofy, they'll help you out. This is in the walkway between Luxor and the Mandalay Bay.

More - the Buffet at Luxor: The name says it all. This is a buffet with more of everything.

Pyramid Cafe: Stop in for your morning fix of food and coffee.

Tacos and Tequila: The food is standard Mexican and there is also a bar.

Tender Steak and Seafood: Dig into a decent steak in a decent room with a lame name. Although, it's a better one than "Supertough" steak, our shortlived restaurant. You won't find a hoof in your cut of meat, and the room is small, understated and old school with its stuffed beanquettes.

Carrot Top: It's prop comedy and the bigger-and-louder-is-funnier brand of comedy. If you like this sort of thing, though, here is the next generation's Gallagher with the added benefit that you won't get smashed watermelon on your clothes.

Cathouse: Don't worry, you're not going to be dancing on furballs and cat scratch towers. The cat house here refers to the club's resemblance to a brothel. The look is complete with huge padded red doors, loads of red velvet, overstuffed booths and video screens of vixens dancing in the faux upper windows.

Criss Angel - Believe: Criss Angel's magic show is exactly that, a magic show, but with attitude. You know, the cool, hipster swagger Angel brings to TV. The show is quick-paced, has some enormous tricks and loads of fireworks.

Fantasy: Do you like the mammaries? Do you like to have them slowly revealed to you in a mid-priced tease show? If you answered yes, this "sexy" revue will foot the bill. It's actually one of the better boobie shows on the Strip. It's a converted movie theater and steeper than a normal live venue.

LAX: This is an imitation of the hot LA club and has all the requisite things to make you feel small if you can't get in, and tall if you spend enough to slip past the velvet rope.

Liquidity: This huge, sprawling bar area dominates the casino floor. It has a somewhat trendy vibe to it.

Menopause the Musical: This one is strictly for the ladies. It's a comedy-musical about women growing older, so we really don't recommend it for the men unless going with their wives is the only way to stop WWIII, or they just love jokes about hot flashes and sagging skin.

Savile Row: This tiny little lounge is by invitation and for members only, so don't expect to find us there. We don't even get invited to church. They claim to have "reliable discretion" and "creative mixology".

Traveling Exhibits: The Luxor hosts traveling exhibits for long periods of time. These are shows typically hosted by museums, such as "Bodies" or Titanic artifacts.

Number of TVs: Nineteen flatscreen TVs plus five big screens are spread out for sports and racing.

Number of Seats: One-hundred-ten chairs, 52 of which have individual TVs, but they are old CRTs that take up most of the table. The remaining seats are for sports and they are the more comfortable ones.

How Many Betting Windows? About eight for race and sports.

Free Drinks? They aren't fast about it, but they do serve free drinks to people who wager and ask for drink chits.

Snack Bar? Nope, but the Backstage Deli is nearby.

Minimum Wager: $10 straight, $10 futures in sports. $2 race.

Other Notes: This is just a small, decent book, worth checking out if you're staying here or at the Excalibur. It is often not crowded.

Number of Tables: Eleven tables.

Comfort of Chairs: Pretty average, actually. At least our butts didn't complain.

Closed Room or Open to Casino? Open but isolated, so it stays fairly quiet. It's non-smoking and far enough from smoke to be okay.

Game Spreads and Limits: Hold-em $2-$4 and up, a $1-$2 no-limit game with $40-$200 buy-in.

Beginner Games or Classes? Classes offered every day in the afternoon.

How Crowded is the Room? Not too busy. Probably you'll wait a bit for a table on weekends, but for the most part the action has migrated to either of the places next door.

Comps? Free drinks while playing. Comps are $5 for four hours of play. Poker room rate for rooms after five hours.

How Good Are the Players? Average to below average. A pretty safe place to play on the Strip for beginners. In face, we would classify this room as a beginner joint.

What Else Do I Need to Know? This is the Bruce Buffer poker room. What does that mean? Not a lot, other than a guy who announces fight matches has attached his name to the room and the felts. There are frequent no-limit tournaments.