How to Get a Drink QUICK in Vegas

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You're in Vegas, so when you go to the watering hole of your choice, you're expecting some liquid libations worth the big bucks you're spending. You deserve something a little stronger when you're paying top dollar on a drink, right? Well, that depends; there are certain moves that could have your bartender turning up his nose at the thought of taking your money, or at least making you wait until everyone else has been served.

When you're in Vegas, "waiting your turn" is pretty much the worst thing that could possibly happen to you (OK, so we're being a little dramatic), so here are a few ways to treat your bartender so that you're not left waiting for eternity at the end of the bar while even that creepy old guy gets to down his second Long Island of the morning before you.

Don't Cause a Ruckus
Obviously don't cause a scene in any way, shape or form (i.e. don't whoop and hollar at your bartender to try to get their attention.) They see you there. They aren't ignoring the green in your hands on purpose. Chances are, they're just busy. Nobody likes to be yelled at, and definitely nobody wants to be bossed around by customers, either. Wait a minute before you decide you need to cause a scene in order to attract their attention.

Rather than get kicked out da' club, we recommend that you stand there politely, make eye contact (but not enough to be creepy or you're probably getting a virgin daquairi) and perhaps show a little...ahem... skin. This may work on the guys, but we're not making any promises, ladies. As for the dudes, you know the deal - money talks.

It's Not Always Their Fault
Don't hate your bartender because they can't make your drink "strong" even though you gave them a semi-acceptable version of a wink and smirk. There are reasons that some bars can't make their drinks strong unless you order a double, and that's because most bars are required to do regulation pours, or it could cost them money (or their job.) It's not your bartender's fault that they can't get you drunk for cheap just because you asked. (But of course it never hurts to ask.) Just don't get mad or pouty when it doesn't work out for you, or you've blown all chances of getting on their good side. (We know, some bartenders just aren't good, and to those, we obviously give you the right to move on to the next bar.)

Don't Give a Skimpy Tip
If you're paying in cash and tipping by the drink, paying for a $9.50 drink, handing your bartender a $10 and telling her to "keep the change" is not going to get you a lot of attention in the future. If you're planning on giving terrible tips, definitely open a tab and save her the harsh reality for the end of the night. Or be a decent human being and learn how to tip your bartender properly. They aren't the ones setting the prices, so if those are what you're mad about, find a bar with better-priced drinks instead of making up for the drink prices by a lack of tipping. It works out better for everyone - their ego and your blood-alcohol level.

They Don't Want to Get Involved
You're on vacation. In Vegas. These bartenders probably aren't going to be your best friend forever since you don't live here, so don't try to hog their time. While we're on the topic, don't try to get them involved in your personal lives, either. Having a fight with your boyfriend at the bar? That's fine. Who hasn't been there? Don't ask your bartender to settle a domestic dispute, because that will definitely get him mingling at the other end of the bar, avoiding the two of you, for the rest of the evening. 

Speaking of Couples...
Or you know, people you just met, (and all the other general things that happen in Vegas) if you're sucking face for 10 minutes and wonder why you still haven't received the offer of a drink yet, well... Don't make it awkward for everyone, especially your bartender. They aren't going to interrupt your PDA to help you out. You look like you're already doing fine on your own, so while they are going to spend more time getting a good time going for the rest of the bar, they are also avoiding awkward interactions with your public bedroom scene. Not only will they avoid you, but often times this could often get you cut off completely. Is any kiss worth one less Budweiser? That's debatable...

Bartenders Like To Chat
But only when they have the time. If you're the only one in the bar and the two of you are just standing around, don't hestitate to strike up a conversation. Not only does this ease the awkward tension in the room, but many times friendly patrons reap more benefits than just having someone to talk about sports and booze with while they're traveling. The perfect answer to "oh, you're making new cocktails all the time, what's the latest one you've perfected" is "here, how about I make it for you, and it's on the house since you didn't actually order it." This doesn't happen every time, but obviously it's more likely to happen when you've charmed your way into their heart while they had nothing better to do.

They Don't All Like Being Hit On
Nope, most people didn't become a bartender to pick up all the tourists coming into town for a night, so believe it or not, they are not trying to go home with you just because you happened to walk into their bar alone. If you're going to hit on a bartender in Vegas all night, at least give the girl (or guy) a big tip to make all that worth it. And don't expect to leave with more than you walked in with, other than a buzz, maybe.

Bartenders in Las Vegas have seen it all. Really, probably a lot more than other bartenders see. Don't try to be ultra coy and think you're going to weasle your way into better deals and stronger drinks, because for most people, that just doesn't work. Basically, think of your idea of a good customer and be that. If you don't like the prices, don't order the drinks. If you don't like the atmosphere, go to a different bar. Don't complain to your bartender, or loudly to everyone around you, and expect to get better service.

There are plenty of Vegas happy hours, cheap bars and Las Vegas coupons that can get you better deals on drinks, so if pricing is your issue, take advantage of all of those.

There's a different kind of bar (and many times, multiple different bars) in every hotel in Las Vegas, so as long as you know the kind of places you like to hang out in, you'll certainly find somewhere you don't mind staying for a few rounds, and that just makes life easier for everyone!

What are your tricks for staying on your bartenders good side when you're in Sin City? Let us know in the comments section below, on our Facebook page or on Twitter. Feel free to @ your favorite bars, and bartenders, to let them know what a great time you had with them and spread the word to other Cheapos.

Need a hand? Here's how to pack for your Vegas Vacation

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Whether you're practically a regular in Vegas or it's your first time, we've all had trips where we wish we had brought that one item we were on the fence about for days, brought a million extra clothes when we were only planning on staying for a night, or packed for the completely wrong season.

Hey, it happens; when you're expecting one thing in Vegas and you get another, it's a total letdown for both your agenda and your wardrobe. Obviously, no one knows exactly every place they're going to go while they're on vacation, making packing a bit of a guessing game. (As in, "I guess I could bring that...")

Here is what we do when we're packing for Vegas to make sure the only regrets we have in Sin City are those brought on by our own misjudgments at the time, not before we even order our first drink. 

Make a List, and Check it Twice
When packing for Vegas, it's important to keep your own to-do list in mind... not someone else's. Don't bring a bunch of fancy dresses if you're going to be sight-seeing, hanging out with other Cheapos in dive bars and hiking all weekend. (Seriously, you're going hiking all weekend?) Pack for your most likely occasions, people.

For those of you who have been to Vegas before, you know that your to-do list can sometimes get muddled with your too-much-list. Happy hours that lead to a few too many Margaritas, an unexpected trip to a fancy restaurant, too many hands at the Blackjack table, too many cocktails with the newly appointed dime (after too many cocktails already) you've been talking to for 3 hours - all of these things can knock some of the planned things to do in Vegas off your list. The good news? You can wear essentially one outfit for all of these activities; the trick is to pack something fit for all of occasions. Ladies should always pack an LBD (Little Black Dress); gentleman, how about something with a collar? Let's keep it casual, just not too casual...

Shoe Selections
Of course if you're planning on going to a nightclub or even stepping foot near the Bellagio, you're going to want to bring dressy shoes, but do not let those be your only shoes. Generally, people do a lot more walking than they anticipated they would. No hotel on the Vegas Strip is as close as it looks. It's a good idea to bring more than one pair of shoes, something ultra chic and something like a sneak(er)... Okay, we'll work on that one.

Nightclub Attire
If you're planning on spending any time at all in one of Vegas' nightclubs, you need to know that most of them do have a dress code that is enforced. Sometimes it's better just to bite the bullet and wash your hair (we know, it must be excruciating spending that extra 2 minutes in the shower and having to let go of a few days of grease) instead of just trying to cover it up with a hat. Most things that don't fly in Vegas clubs are hats, ripped jeans, brown shoes with black pants (that's more for your own sake), shorts, jerseys and muscle shirts are all on the no-fly list at most Las Vegas clubs. We like this guide for dressing for the club in Vegas, so obviously we can pass it on to you.

Pool Party Necessities
Vegas is hot. You know why? Because it's in the freakin' desert, that's why. The sun's a-blazin' most months of the year. Since you don't want to be a lobster the second day into your trip, make sure to pack sunscreen. (Checked bags only. Seriously, FAA?) Remember - it's completely un-sexy to be the tomato in the room.

Bringing a Camera
A risky decision. You might lose it, come home with some incriminating photos, or use it to remember what happened last night. If you know that you're going to want to document your efforts in Vegas, bring your camera. If you are one of those people that likes the idea of having a camera more than the actual taking of pictures, a camera in Vegas might just be weighing you down. And if you're a guy, remember that at least one lady in your party will be snapping pictures for Facebook all night/weekend. Just mootch off hers.

Our Friends, the Layers
Vegas is one of those places that can be crazy hot in the day and surprisingly chilly at night. (Again, it's the desert.) If you're not there during the summer, or even if you are and get goosebumps at the thought of the sun going down, be sure to bring a something warm for the cooler nights in Sin City. It also rains a bit during the winter months, so check the weather forecast when you're planning your packing as well!

Hangover Pills
Crucial! Bring all the reinforcements you can to help keep the party going through the weekend. We recommend ginseng pills or those awesome little Party Smart vitamins.

(Editor's Note: We are NOT - repeat - NOT doctors. Do not take these recommendations as medical advice. Just know that we've, um, tested these little guys out and they seem to lessen the headache potential the following day. Hey, whatever it takes for you to not feel terrible the next day.)

Variety is the Spice of... Your Suitcase
It's never a bad idea to just bring a little bit of everything if you don't know what the heck you'll be doing. Something casual, something nice, something comfortable. There's three outfits that you can't go wrong with, and you've still got plenty of room in your suitcase to take home all the tacky Vegas shot glasses, souvenir cups, and something that probably has boobs on it.

Even for those of you who have never been before, it's universally understood that a Vegas vacation is not your typical vacation. Be prepared for the unprepared, even when it comes to your wardrobe! Don't be that one who has to buy an outfit at the place you thought was for "working ladies only" just so you can get into the club of your choice, or the one in a fancy dress and heels walking down the Strip during the middle of the day because "you thought that's how people in Vegas dress." Believe us, the fashion police do not patrol the streets of Vegas, so always choose comfort over style unless you're going somewhere with a dress code.

Let us know what you can't live without when you go to Vegas in the comments section below, or on Facebook, Twitter or Google+. A man of many medias, Casino Boy is!

How to Dine in Vegas for $30 a Day or Less

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Las Vegas may be famous for their buffets, but unless you're only planning on eating just once a day or sneaking away desserts and pizza slices in your girlfriend's purse, you're probably going to be paying a lot to dine in Las Vegas. Plus, odds are you'll be feeling extremely uncomfortable because, like everyone else, you tried to get your money's worth out of a Vegas buffet. This is a bummer for everyone involved because A.) You're miserable B.) You're making the air unbearable for everyone else, and C.) In a few hours, you're just going to be hungry again. If you eat at a Las Vegas buffet and are trying to stick to the $30 a day plan, there goes at least $20 just on one meal, and was it even worth it?

The fact is, you can easily eat in Las Vegas for less than $30 a day. Heck, at some meals you can even have a cocktail or two at and still come in under budget. Just because you're in the land of $30 buffets and $12 drinks doesn't mean that you can't dine like a true Cheapo! Here are some of our favorite places to choose from when we're dining on $30 a day or less...

Breakfast of Champi... Errr... Cheapos

You may remember some of these from our list of the best hangover breakfasts, but many of those Vegas eateries didn't make this list because you have to pay a little extra to reap the benefits of enough starch, fat and grease to really cure a Vegas hangover. The following eateries, however, offer Vegas breakfast options that are easy on your wallet. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, right? Funny, because it's often the cheapest meal of the day, too. Some of our favorite Cheapo breakfasts include...

• Omelet House: In Downtown Vegas, because almost everyone can get a hearty meal here for right around $8 (plus a little tip because the service is friendly, too.) They have great breakfast specials (which of course are not available on the weekends) as well as the items you'd expect to see on every menu, but for a price you're not going to cringe over. People love the eggs Benedict and the corned beef and hash, even though those meals are around $9-$10 each. Add a $2 slice of banana nut bread if you're feeling "nutty"...
• Grand Cafe at Boulder Station: They have the $3.99 "2 Egg Anytime Skillet" which gives you a hearty meal of, eggs, toast, bacon or sausage and hash browns. They also have other specials later in the day, including a 1/2 soup, 1/2 sandwich plate for $5.99 and a $7.99 lunch/dinner special of the week. Not too shabby, Boulder Station. PLUS, they're open 24/7, so of course you can expect a few late night specials here too, should you be in the area in the early hours.
• Peppermill Restaurant: If you want a cheap breakfast without going off the Strip, you can expect to pay a little bit more, but it might save you money in terms of transportation. Plus, the portions at Peppermill are huge, so you might not have to eat for a while, or can use this as your main meal and have a light lunch (like, Miller Lite for lunch, right?) instead. You can get most meals for around $10-$15, but the biscuits and gravy are only $7.95. (Which normally we'd complain about, but here we'll take what we can get!) If you're one of those people who sleeps until noon and then wants breakfast, it's served 24 hours here and could probably hold you over until it's time for an early dinner.
• Marilyn's Cafe: Also located close to the Strip, Marilyn's Cafe has biscuits and gravy for half the price of the Peppermill ($3.99), as well as many other reasonably-priced dishes. Many meals at this little Tuscany Hotel and Casino Treasure come in around $8, but if you're good at mixing and matching, you could probably get a group of side menu items for less.

Lunch (Or as we Cheapos like to refer to it, 'Happy Hour')

We cannot stress enough the importance of a hearty lunch, which usually consists of a few margaritas on special for three hours a day with free chips or a cheap meal to hold us over until we're out of the casino floor and craving something that we probably can't even taste. We've already told you our favorite Vegas happy hour specials this summer - many of which also have food specials - but for every day pricing, check out these cheap Vegas lunches:

• Earl of Sandwich: We cannot stress enough how important these Vegas restaurants are to our wallets and hearts. If you're eating in Vegas for cheap, you're going to really appreciate the delicacies you can get here for around $6(ish), and you don't even have to tip here. We could tell you the favorites, but they're literally all good. If you want to change up your dining experience, you can do that too. They have one location at Planet Hollywood and a brand new location at the Palms. 
• Tacos El Gordo: There's one Downtown and another on the Vegas Strip to ease your lunchtime Mexican cravings which, even if that doesn't ease your stomach for the rest of the night, will be well worth it. Unlike a few cheap Mexican places (or even some of the pricey ones) the food here is pretty darn good. Go for the carne asada or the Adobada tacos and you won't be disappointed. Who can say no to a $2 taco that actually tastes like a delicious and nutricious taco? 

Linner, Dinner, Fourth Meal ... Fourinner? Whatever you want to call "Eating Late"...

While many of us haven't differentiated between lunch, dinner and late night specials, there are a few people in Vegas that still like to eat dinner before 10pm, or after 3pm. Most of those people are making fancy dinner reservations at Bellagio restaurants, hustling up to the buffets like suckers who couldn't put a little effort into finding a good meal deal or our friends who just woke up and are going to the places that might still be serving breakfast. If you're not one of these people, how about:

• Ellis Island Brewery: Actually, you can't go wrong with any meal here, and most of them are well-priced and will easily fit into your budget. Sandwiches, steaks, BBQ and even a little menu of house specialties can all be bought for less than $10. (And many even a few bucks cheaper than that.) This is cheap enough so you will even have enough to have a brew with your dinner, which is convenient when you're at a brewery. Their craft beers are just $2 each, so drink up!
• Chicago Brewing Co: $4 beers, $10 pizzas, $8 wings? Yes, sounds like dinner to us... 
• Mr. Lucky's: The Gambler Special at this Hard Rock Hotel and Casino diner for $7.77 can't really be beat for a steak, shrimp, side and a salad. It's available whenever the restaurant is open, which is always. So that's pretty agreeable, too.
• Westside Deli: At Circus Circus, you can find a $2.95 giant hot dog here. (The effort to not make a dirty and inappropriate joke about loving giant dogs in our mouth is almost as hard as resisting these dogs. We digress.)

If late-night snacking if more your thing, check out these late night Vegas restaurants whenever you get the craving for something after a long night out and about the city. Vegas may be famous for their fancy restaurants and buffets, but that doesn't mean that you have to eat at them. Vegas is also famous for their 99 cent shrimp cocktails at the casinos and the chips they serve there, too, but those chips aren't as helpful as quenching your appetite as they are at ensuring you'll surely need a Cheapo place to dine. Let us know where your favorite place to eat on the cheap is, and what you get there when you're sticking to a budget in Vegas is by commenting below, joining us on Facebook or following us on Twitter! 

Banned in Vegas! What They Did, What You Shouldn't Do, What a Buzz Kill

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Banned in Vegas? What a buzz kill! This is supposed to be the city where anything goes, right? Actually, that's a common myth, because while many people think that you can do what you want, say what you want, wear what you want and act however the @#$! you want, you can't. Vegas has their rules too, no matter how much looser they our than the rest of the world's, you can still get banned from Vegas.

Now, don't worry. You pretty much have to do something terrible or extremely offensive/illegal/completely stupid to get banned from the casinos in Vegas, but it doeshappen. Because we care about you, here's a small list of things that you should avoid doing if you don't want to cause a ruckus and end up on your butt...cus?... or out of the party. Basically here's what (definitely) not to do in Vegas. (Speaking of things you shouldn't do, here's our guide to what not to joke about in Las Vegas, too.)

Don't Start a Boycott
It's really easy to tell all your fans not to go somewhere and have them listen to you, but come on, that's a little rude! Let people find out for themselves, right!? Or at least confine it to a 1-star rating on Yelp like the rest of us! Vince Neil of Motley Crue obviously didn't think his Yelp review would have quite the effect as a boycott would, so when he wasn't pleased with a meal he had at one of the Palms restaurants, he told his fans to definitely not eat there ever. Vinsanity = BANNED.

Don't Try To Get In If You're Underage
Sorry One Direction, even though you're teen-sensations, you're still not 21 yet, and Vegas is a lot harder to please with your charming words than most teenage girls are. No matter how hard you plan on partying, if you're not of age, you're banned from the casinos and clubs in Vegas, which is a good thing for those of us who are trying to ward off the sight of Justin Bieber for the next few months years. As for you, One Direction, you'll stay confined to house parties and sneaking liquor from your parents' cabinet like the rest of us had to endure. #getonourlevel

Don't Try to Party When Your Forbidden From Drinking
If the law sentences you to three years of no drinking, you should probably not try to go to parties with Drake, or maybe you should team up with Lil' Wayne for some kind of support group.  Either way, if Steve Wynn finds out about it and the party is at his hotel, you're officially off the guest list.

Don't Get Violent in the Club
Well, it's probably a good idea not to get violent anywhere, especially as a repeat offender who just got done with your anger management classes. Have you no shame, Chris Brown? If you're with a group of ladies and buying them drinks all night, then they pass you up for someone way more awesome, don't yell at anyone about it. Perhaps find a new group of girls to charm or take your losses like everyone else. You can pop champagne with anyone, but you can't pop anyone for not drinking your champagne. That's just rude! Haze doesn't like it when Chris Brown "gets up in anyone's face", and none of the other clubs in Vegas do, either.

Don't Bet Your Car (Especially in Your Parents' Casino)
Not even your legal guardians will want you hanging around the poker tables when you lose your Bentley in a card game like Paris Hilton did. She got banned, from her own casino. Now, most of you don't have parents who own casinos in Vegas, but maybe there is still a lesson to be learned from this. Perhaps, if you don't have the money, don't bet your car, because you'll need something to drive you home after getting kicked out, even if you don't have the money to fill up the tank.

Don't Buy in Minimums You Can't Afford
Have mercy, we Cheapos know better than this already. But for those of you knew to Cheapo-status (aka, those of you who have suffered in this economy, have contributed to the unemployment rate, or have been recently cut off from your parents' trust fund *cough* Brandon Davis *cough*) you need to know that if you buy in at a $5,000 minimum, you have to pay that! Vegas is the real deal. Chips=$$$$. This is not monopoly, and just because you have a debit card or credit card doesn't mean you have an endless money flow bro! Basically, overloading your credit in a casino will inevitably get you banned.

Don't Mistake Your Drugs for Gum
Common Mistake, we know, but really, if you want to hang out in Vegas, you have to get the two figured out. Or at least not carry a bag that things can easily fall out of. That's right, you may remember the time when Paris Hilton (we're picking on her today) spilled her cocaine when she was trying to get lip balm from her purse, but when questioned, she alleged that she borrowed that bag from a friend and that she thought it was gum! Needless to say she was arrested anyways, but she was also banned from the Wynn casinos. Bummer. 

DJs: Don't Refuse to Play 'Call Me Maybe'
We need to hear this, because obviously a club is the only time we can hear the song. (It's definitely not on the radio, ever.) Calvin Harris was kicked off the deck at Tryst for refusing to play this song. The lesson here is to give the people what they want, whether it hurts your musical  genius or not. (Note: This specific rule relating to 'Call Me Maybe' should expire in about 6-8 4-6 weeks)

Don't Piss off Steve Wynn
I think it's pretty safe to say from all of this that he's a very influential part of Vegas, but he's also a very touchy guy, or something. He's kicked out Paris Hilton, Lil' Wayne and God knows who else. Yes, those people are probably a lot more misbehaved than the average Joe, but if you're reading all of this, you're probably the kind of Joe that might potentially have it in you to get on Steve Wynn's bad side.  

Basically, there are probably a million things you can do to get kicked out of the clubs, casinos, restaurants and hotel rooms in Vegas. More than you'd think actually. The 'anything goes' policy that many people associate with Vegas is a myth. There are lots of myths most people who don't frequent the city associate it with. If you think that something you're doing is illegal, immoral and completely inappropriate, there's a solid chance that it is. Let us know what you've done seen others do to get kicked out of a Vegas venue in the comments section below, on our awesome Facebook page, or by following our not-so-surprisingly hysterical Twitter. No, we are not egotistical. 

Jokes That Just Don't Fly in Vegas

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Well, we all know that Daniel Tosh has no boundaries, but when you’re in Vegas trying to have a good time, it might not be the same story.

First of all, you don’t have a whole theatre full of people who are paying to see you be offensive, so a lot of people think that’s reason enough to keep your mouth shut when you don’t have anything good to say. If you're an average Cheap0 like us, there are certain things that you just can’t get away with joking about in Las Vegas, for several reasons. (Unless of course you're The Gazillionaire.) 

There are a lot of people in Vegas that you really shouldn’t offend, so don’t bite the hand that feeds you, deals your cards, serves your drinks, lets you in the club or handles the credit card you book your room with. These are a few of the jokes that just don’t fly in Vegas, so know before you go, and way before your stupid joke draws crickets or, worse yet, cuffs..

Don’t diss the King. Elvis is The King, and we don’t take kindly to anyone who makes fun of him or anybody impersonating him. (Unless he’s Big Elvis at Harrah’s; that guy kills it. Dudes hanging out on every corner of The Strip? Not so much...)

Don’t joke about being a lot richer than you are. Seriously, stop kiddin' yourself - and your bank account - by throwing down a dime on red. The only one laughing will be Vegas... all the way to the bank, that is.

Don’t go to Vegas joking about reenacting scenes from movies. The Hangover, Ocean’s Eleven, Fear and Loathing, Swingers... All of which are awesome movies that take place in Vegas, but few of which resemble what we consider reality. (Though Jon Favreau leaving voicemail after voicemail does hit pretty close to home.) Besides, if you think you’re going to end up on the roof of Caesars Palace, you’re just one more goof in Vegas, and that's no good for anyone.

Don’t wear a terrible outfit because you think it’s funny. Seriously, nobody thinks you’re funny except you and possibly the guy you came with that hasn’t taken more than two breaths between margarita gulps since he got here. He thinks everything is funny, but bouncers at the club and entertainers on the Strip have already labeled you "that guy" and probably won’t be letting you in. Leave the Hawaiian shirt at home, brah.

Don’t be a comedian on Twitter. Unless you’ve got Twitter on your phone, don’t log-in with any of the hotels in your room and expect to pay less than $14 a day. If you have to make fun of someone you see on the Strip, upload embarrassing photos of your friends or tell the world you just ran into the entire cast of Thunder From Down Under (#dreamcometrue), do it via phone or wait until you get home!

Don’t joke about having a fake ID. That will not help you get anywhere in life, ever. If you’re really 21 and up, there’s no reason to joke that you’re not. If you’re not, they’ll probably be able to tell; joke’s on you, buddy.

Don’t make fun of the Cheapos. Sorry* that we like good prices, no resort fees and all the freebies that the city has to offer. (OK, not all the freebies; you can hang on to those 1pm hypnosis show tickets. Seriously, we're good.) We call it being awesome practical, and while you’re gambling away your savings at the Bellagio because you didn’t know about all the Vegas tips that Cheapo Vegas tried to warn all you first timers about, we’re getting weird at our favorite (yes, cheapo) bars, meeting ladies and having the time of our lives.

*Editor's Note: We’re not sorry

Don’t use the “What Happens in …” tagline to get away with everything. In the age of the Internet, nothing actually stays, well, here. Not to mention the ATM charges, poor buffet choices and mistake wives can be pretty haunting, too. Just take our advice and know that whatever happens here will be following you around well after you hop on a plane to bid Sin City adieu. What we're saying is, don't do anything we wouldn't do. Assuming, you know, we can think of something...

Don’t joke about your friend having drugs on him. We're not really sure why you would do this, but, it certainly will not end up fun for your friend, and you have got some bad karma coming your way if you and your “bro” end up explaining your loud mouth to the po-po.

Don’t joke about counting cards. That’s just dumb. Plus, we all know you can't count to 52.

If you really want to make jokes at other people's expense, we recommend doing what Casino Boy did and create a website dedicate to just that! Anyways, since we love hearing from other Cheapos, let us know what the worst joke in Vegas you heard was on Facebook, Twitter or Google+.

(P.S. Alert to the Cheapos! We have a new feature on our blogs, so listen up if you want to know how it works - or just press buttons until something happens like the rest of us do. From now on, you can find hotels near the events, places and fun cheapo things to do that you’re always reading about in our blogs. (Because you definitely read every single blog we write, right?) Granted, this feature is less relevant for this blog because you can stay anywhere in Vegas and still not really be able to say these things, but you can still use it to find a hotel for when you do want to stay in your price range and luxury level. Pick your dates, adjust the buttons and let Cheapo Vegas help you find a place to crash. Plus, you can still comment on our blog - and we highly encourage that you do so - in the comments section below!)

It's 5 o'clock ... Nowhere: The Best Day Drinking in Las Vegas

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If you're anything like the lot of us at Cheapo Vegas, when you go to Las Vegas you don't feel the need to confine your beer drinking to after 7pm. Hello, can we get a happy hour up in here? But some of us (*cough cough Casino Boy*) like to get started even a little earlier than that sometimes.

Nobody blames him, the Boy likes to have a good time. Besides, Vegas has more tempting bars than you can fit into a few nights of drinking, so why not hit up a few Vegas day drinking bars, when the drinks are cheaper and the cover charge is nonexistent. Luckily, you can save the exclusively night spots for night time and you can put a dent in a few kegs and liquor cabinets at the best day drinking spots in Las Vegas.

Carnival Court Bar and Grill at Harrah's Las Vegas

Flair bartenders "Doin' flips 'n s**t" as Lonely Island would so eloquently put it, live music and strong, strong drinks. If you get here before 8pm there's no cover charge. The atmosphere is lively, entertaining and no one is as stuck up as they will be when you hit up the nightlife club scene. Throw on your most comfortable day drinking attire, keep it very casual if you're drinking here during the summer heat because it's an outdoor bar in Vegas, and get ready for a great time.

Day Drink of Choice: Put the flair bartenders to work and order the most intricate drink you can think of while they put on a show making it for you. If not, take a shot or order beers by the pitchers. Plenty of people will be ordering specialty drinks to allow the bartenders to show off their tricks Tom Cruise-in-Cocktail style.

Freakin' Frog

When do we not recommend this place? They've won spots in our Vegas beer lovers guides, the best music venues, and - most improtantly - Casino Boy's heart. They have 1,000 beers and 600 whiskies to choose from so the main question is, 'What won't we be drinking during the day?' The live music doesn't usually happen while the sun's out, but that's okay because there are plenty of other entertaining things to do while you're burning daylight - whether it's a tour of the beer cooler or whiskey attic or just trying to stay lively enough to try your 10th new beer. And while you're there, you might as well stay for happy hour, right?

Day Drink of Choice: Probably a beer; it is one of the best beer bars in Vegas after all. You have 1,000 to choose from, and that’s really between you and your bartender to decide. This is way too personal for us to have a say in. Just get a beer, that’s all we’ll say.

Frankie's Tiki Room

This is said to be the only 24 hour tiki bar in the U.S., and perhaps there is a reason that it's the only one located in Sin City. The drinks are ranked by skulls, so this may not be the safest day drinking spot for those of you with little self control and something to prove. However, for the daring adventurers who think they can hang though, a weekend day is the perfect time to visit this Off-Strip Vegas spot.

Day Drink of Choice: Day Drink of Choice: "The Fink Bomb." Rum, melon and pineapple sounds innocent and girl-y, but it’s a 5 skull-er and it’s not afraid to kick your butt. Yes, this is the Angelina Jolie in Wanted of day drinks.

Fat Tuesday

Well, there's rarely a time that isn't good to grab a drink on the go for a stroll. If you cruise the Strip with your frozen drink you won't be confined to the happenings in one bar, because there's so much more to see and things to do. You don't have to separate sightseeing and day drinking in Vegas with the luxury of Fat Tuesdays, plus they're scattered throughout The Strip.

Day Drink of Choice: The 190 Octane. This may be the only good use of Everclear, other than for sterilizing the harshest of wounds and starting bonfires.

Double Down Saloon

Cheap drinks, A$$ Juice and a grungy dive bar. Many of the (self-proclaimed) glamorous people coming to Vegas to strut their stuff in Gucci and glitter might not think of this as an ideal drinking spot. But if those are the kind of people you're looking to get away from (and who might be the ones driving you to day drink), head a short ways from The Strip to this watering hole and see where the real Vegas day drinkers are hanging out.

Day Drink of Choice: The infamous A$$ Juice; it’s what they’re known for after all, so be a good tourist and try some. Even the locals are indulging.

Parasol Up and Down at the Wynn Las Vegas

If a dive bar isn't your style, then maybe this place more up your alley. (Also, no offense from the last paragraph.) It's at the Wynn, so maybe change into something a little nicer if you hit this place up after the Double Down, that way you won't get any dirty looks from the old cat lady here enjoying her virgin daiquiri.

The atmosphere here is very cool and relaxing, and the sights are definitely on par with everything you'd expect from the Wynn. This is a great place to day drink before you head over to nightclubs like Tryst, XS or Surrender, because the drinks are cheaper here and you'll actually have somewhere to sit, so enjoy it while you can!

Day Drink of Choice: A nice, fancy cocktail. You’re going to be paying around $12 a drink anyways, so make it count. Besides, the cocktails here are refreshingly good. Once you get over the price, you won’t be disappointed.

When you're vacationing in Vegas, there's about a 90% chance you're going to have a drink during the day. If you're not doing that while gambling, laying in bed or partying poolside, then check out some of the best day drinking in Las Vegas at these bars. Some of them are definitely more Cheapo-worthy than others, just like some are more laid back and some are full on party spots.

Let us know what your favorite place in Vegas to day drink is in the comments section below. Or you can add us on Facebook or follow us on Twitter. You can follow us in real life too if you'd like, but expect to be hanging out in these joints quite a bit.

No Time for a Hangover Here! The Best Hangover Breakfasts in Las Vegas

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"A hangover is when you open your eyes in the morning and wish you didn't." - Someone wise who knows us far too well ...

The best hangover breakfasts in Las Vegas are ones that will make us lose that regret of being alive, shake off the previous night's shenanigans and give us the strength for another day in Sin City, hopefully better than the one before. If possible.

Yes, Las Vegas is one of the biggest party cities in the world. That is a fact. But such a highly regarded reputation does of course come with a few consequences, and if you're traveling to Las Vegas to party, you'll probably be paying that consequence in the form of your first (or second, third or fourth - let's face it, some things will just never stop) Vegas hangover.

Many say that the cure to a hangover is to wake up and start drinking again. (We know all about the best spots for that, too.) But if you're one of those people that likes a food cure instead of booze, we've got you covered! There are plenty of places to cure your hangover in Vegas so that you can continue the fun post-headache.

Hash House a Go Go: Be prepared for huge portions of fresh food. This is perhaps the best place in Las Vegas to treat your hangover, so order the chicken and waffles, eggs Benedict or whatever works best. They have 3 locations in Las Vegas, so crawl to the one closest to you and you'll be back on your feet in no time!

Hangover Breakfast Burger at Binion's Cafe: A juicy burger topped with a fried egg, bacon, cheese and all the dressings (the healthy ones) for a well balanced meal, complete with hash browns or fries. Yes, well balanced indeed! This $10 meal is sure to pick you up and might even have you ready to forgive the tequila you were swearing off this morning. They make it so easy for us to give alcohol a second chance!

Wanna' dine with locals? Blueberry Hill Family Restaurant on the Eastside is the place to do it.. The pancakes are made from scratch, the portions and prices are almost decent for Vegas standards and the service isn't nearly as rushed. Actually, not rushed at all, if you catch our drift. (It's slow, is what we're saying.) We hear good things about the chicken fried steak if you think that protein and fried food is what really cures your hangover, but the pancakes do the trick for us.

Earl of Sandwich: Easily one of our favorites when we can't handle the sweet pancake and waffle breakfasts, or just need something with a little a lot of substance to get our blood flowing again. Conveniently open 24/7 for the early birds or the breakfast at 4pm-ers, this Vegas restaurant has fast service, great food and it's definitely cheapo status! Find it at Planet Hollywood and soon at the Palms.

Peppermill Restaurant and Lounge: They are known for their late-night dining, but their breakfast is a real crowd please-er as well. The portions are huge, perfect for soaking up every ounce of alcohol that didn't end up on your dance partner last night, and the prices are well worth it. The staff makes every trip enjoyable as well, aka they don't judge you based on attire, hairstyle or last night's smeared make-up, and are extremely patient no matter how slow we are attempting to order.

The hair of the dog that bit you... Stupid mutts.

If you prefer to cure that party headache with, well, more partying, try the following Vegas restaurants...

Wicked Spoon Champagne Brunch: Many of the weekend Vegas brunch buffets can be upgraded for a few extra dollars to include bottomless champagne. If you're one of those people who go to brunch but aren't sure how you feel about drinking before noon, then you probably didn't come to Vegas for the same reasons we do. But we're going to share a little secret with you - in Vegas, nobody judges you for having a drink before 12 or, for that matter, any time of the day.

• No-So-Cheapo but Oh-So-Worth-It Alert: The Wicked Spoon brunch is about $30 a person (including the bottomless mimosas) which can be a pretty great deal if you take advantage of that all-you-can-drink part. We are famished and ready to booze it up every morning on vacation, so this is an obvious choice for us. Plus you can eat so much at breakfast that you won't have to eat again until we get the drunk munchies at dinner time.

Jimmy Buffett's Margaritaville: They actually have a good breakfast and are open at 8am, but they also serve margaritas, which we won't say "No" to at any time of the day. Yes, they're a little pricey, but you're getting the best of both worlds in one spot, which is the ultimate no-hassle solution for a Vegas hangover. Definitely look for a Las Vegas coupon before you eat because they're always floating around, and tip your margarita to the people stumbling by you on the Strip, full of envy but too hungover to open their peepers enough to give you the stink eye.

Fat Tuesday: If no food at all is the breakfast for you, these stations open at 10am and there is really no better way to start a morning than with a daiquiri, am I right? 

Vegas Hangover Tips for Your Meal, from the Experts:

• If you don't go with a drink first thing in the morning, or if you do, it will be wise for you to order at least a few glasses of water along with your meal, whether you want to or not.
• Coffee and juice also help, so why not kill two birds with one stone and get a cranberry vodka, a water and a coffee? Well, that's three, but we don't know any cliches involving  that many birds.
• Pickles and pickle juice are said to help hangovers, so ask for extra pickles on your sandwich, or possibly a pickle back if you want an extra leg up. (Although more than a few of these might put both of your legs up by noon... again.)
• Pop a "Party Smart" or ginseng pill after your first drink of the night. You'll thank us later. (And no, we don't get any sort of kickback from promoting these things. We're just trying to help, Cheapos!)

Let us know what your favorite hangover breakfast in Vegas is in the comments section below. We like to hear what you have to say (whether it's helpful to our own hangovers or you're praising us for being great role models), so add us on Facebook and join the discussion, or follow us on Twitter to stay informed on the rest of our whereabouts, discoveries and tips for Vegas travelers just like you.

Mark Your Calendars: Las Vegas First Fridays in the Downtown Arts District

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July is coming fast, and you know what that means - the next First Friday in the Las Vegas Arts District is coming up quick!

(Oh, you didn't know that? Well, it's a good thing you're tight with Casino Boy.)

The Downtown Las Vegas Arts District holds this free, family friendly event on the - wait for it - first Friday of every month. For the most part, there's an abundance of various art of all shapes, sizes and types feast your eyes on, but that's not the only feast to be had. With several food trucks posted throughout the streets, plus blocks filled with shops and galleries to stroll in and out of, no one will go hungry.

Not only will there will be plenty of food and art to go around, about a dozen bands are set to play at various locations during First Friday Las Vegas, so there's free entertainment to be had as well!

And don't worry, thirsty Cheapos - there are plenty of bars in the Las Vegas Arts District to provide enough liquid libations to make this fun for the whole family (or at least fun for the boyfriend that you're possibly dragging along.)

Either way, once you've made the commitment to go to First Friday in Vegas' Arts District - or you still need a little enticing -  here are a few more things that you won't want to miss while you're here ...

Here's what you need to know!

• First Friday is a monthly street festival in the Arts District of Downtown Las Vegas, the first freakin' Friday of every month from about 6pm-11pm. 
• It's FREE! Of course if you want to buy anything (and you will), that will cost you, but lookin's cheap and that's why we go to bars instead of on dates. Wait, what? Augh.
• Ready for some numbers? There are 100+ artists (painters, potters, photographers, jewelers and more) set up permanently in the Las Vegas Arts District and, on top of that, another 50 artists that temporarily set up shot outside for your listening, viewing and entertaining pleasures.  
• The food trucks will be there to keep you full and fat happy, but there are full-time Vegas restaurants in the Arts District available for a sit down meal, too.
• Bring the whole family! How many Las Vegas family friendly events available on a monthly basis are actually worth going to? The list can be short. However, there are plenty of kid friendly happenings from 6pm-9pm at First Fridays Las Vegas before the usual Vegas crowds take over the bars Downtown. 

The artsy places you don't want to miss

• The Arts Factory: This place is full of art, full time patrons, visiting artists and new exhibitions all the time. On top of that they have a bar and bistro right there. Art, tapas and cocktails in one? Okay, if we must!
• Brett Wesley Gallery: They are a favorite in this town known for binge drinking and strippers, but their art is just as interesting as nights involving either or both of those things! You won't want to miss a walk through this gallery.
• Trifecta Gallery: Places like these give Las Vegas the "culture" that you thought died with all those signs in the Neon Boneyard. Two story galleries just make it twice as likely that you'll be going home with a new addition to your family, and not the kind that you have to feed and clean 50 times a day. 
• Blackbird Studios: A little off the beaten path of the Las Vegas Arts District, this place has cool events on First Fridays and then a "Drink and Draw" event on the 3rd Friday of every month. You don't want to see the things that Casino Boy draws when he drinks.
• The Gypsy Den is an old wagon converted to a thrift store with tons of little gems if you're not looking to make a big investment in a piece of art right now.

Let's get down to business...

Where are we going to get our drink on after - or before - we do a little art perusing. Don't drink too much or you might walk out with just about everything you don't need. This is not the kind of Vegas regrets that you want to take home with you, but let's face it, it's a little better than some of the regrets that could follow you home.

• Downtown Cocktail Room: They're hopping on Las Vegas First Fridays, and for good reason. They've got great house music and a pretty good drink menu when you need to slurp back a few.
• Beauty Bar: While most people think of this as the go-to Las Vegas Downtown bar for Nickel F~~cking Beer Nights (obviously because it's just such an eloquent name to attract crowds - and they're NICKEL F~~CKING BEERS) they attract crowds on First Fridays as well. Some people claim that Beauty Bar is like New Years on First Fridays, and we like that possibility of maybe getting a kiss at some point in a night, so why wouldn't you check it out? They have great live music though, so if the arts haven't put you in a romantic mood all day, then maybe your dance moves will work magic on some lucky lady this night.

So basically, whether you've considered it or not, First Fridays in Downtown Las Vegas' Arts District are a pretty cool change of pace to the Vegas nightlife scene, without going too far off the map. We still want to have fun, we didn't come to Vegas for no reason, but this event gives you a little taste of something other than boozing and grinding, and we kind of like that every now and then. 

Have you ever been to a First Friday in Las Vegas? Let us know about your thoughts, purchases, favorites and insider tips in the comments section below, on our Facebook page or you can even Tweet us about it. Also, if you're looking to get involved in this kind of thing, you can find out more info about volunteering or becoming a vendor using this link right here.

Desperately Seeking Sandwich- The Best Las Vegas Late Night Dining

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When in Vegas, it's really important to know about all the late night dining spots that offer food you might actually want to eat when you're sober and won't have you feeling taken advantage of in your drunken stupor late night state. (Not that there will be much in the way of leftovers, but you could at least avoid a belly ache the following morning.)

A notorious night owl (and sufferer of the "Drunchies"), Casino boy is here to help everyone out there who are desperately seeking sandwich! Forget Susan - we need a hoagie and tots, please! We'll make it real simple for you, so that you can get off the computer, out to the bar and then on to your graveyard dining destinations. Here's a simple guide to the best Las Vegas late night dining. Okay, we'll admit that most of our suggestions aren't actually sandwiches, but that's okay with you guys, right? Let's face it - diversity is a must when it comes Las Vegas dining.

So here you go; Our favorite cheap pizza, sandwiches and tacos to tide you over until morning!

Secret Pizza at the Cosmopolitan: Okay, this used to be a secret, but the cat's pretty much out of the bag with this Vegas pizzeria by now. They have thin crust pizza, pin ball machines and they're open until 5am. The line might be long, so bring whatever friend you made at the club to "entertain" you while you wait. Not to worry - the pizza is worth the wait, and the prices are very Cheapo-friendly.

Tacos El Gordo in Downtown Vegas is open until 5am on weekends, and their $2 street tacos and $4 specialties bring in quite the crowd. Beware of the spicy stuff! Don't try to be a hero just because you have a few Miller Lites in you - it will not be worth it once you've sobered up and can actually feel the effect of the spicy jalapeno peppers. You can get it to go, and that way if you pass out right when you get to your room you have breakfast. Mexican is the perfect cuisine for an early morning meal right before you pass out until 3pm the next day, right? The only downfall is that they don't serve alcohol here, so make sure to bring a flask or come with your blood pre-marinated.

Earl of Sandwich at Planet Hollywood: Our highest recommended stop for late-night dining at PH. They're open 24 hours a day, so you don't have to rush back from the club, unless you're just that hungry and/or really need a bathroom. All of their sandwiches are good, but the ones that come highly recommended are the Caribbean Jerk, Tuna Melt, Roast beef or even their breakfast sandwich if you get in before 11am.

The Peppermill is right between the the Wynn and the Riviera, and you're sure to be "wynning" with a meal from here. (Bad puns are back in style, Cheapos!) Bask in the neon lights that are considered powerful even by Las Vegas standards. It's a little pricier than some of the aforementioned spots, but it's definitely still a Cheapo find, especially for it's location by the hoity-toity Wynn. Casino boy wouldn't steer you away from this place. (That being said, you really shouldn't allow CB to drive.)

Ellis Island Casino and Brewery: The cheap eats here are almost as great as the beers you get at this Las Vegas brewery. A late night Vegas restaurant with a prime rib special might not seem all that special these days, but trust us, this is one of the best in town. Most of their food is good, actually. And really, are we going to turn down a spot where we can keep drinking through the night as we shove food down our pie-holes? That doesn't sound like us.

Market Street Cafe in Downtown Las Vegas: We hear great things about the Oxtail soup and Hawaiian cuisine, but we like it because of all the great prices and the fact that it's a 24-hour Vegas restaurant. They've got tons of Vegas late night specials to ease the pain that will come tomorrow...

So there you have it. These are our favorite Cheapo late night restaurants in Las Vegas for when we're desperately seeking a sandwich - or pizza, tacos and whatever else a waitress will serve us, really. The most important things to know when you're going to Vegas are where you'll snooze, where you'll party, the best Vegas deals you can get and where you can eat once the day is done! Luckily, we got your back and have the inside scoop on all of it. 

There are late night Las Vegas dining spots in almost every hotel out there, but some are better than others, and the ones in this list are the best and the cheapest around! Let us know your favorite late night dining spot, whether it's on our list or not! You can comment below, Tweet us, or drop us a line on Facebook. Believe or not, we love to talk about the best food, booze and fun in Sin City. 

Best Las Vegas Happy Hours This Summer

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There's no better way to spend a summer afternoon in Sin City than sipping (or chugging if you're like Casino Boy) cocktails at the best Las Vegas happy hours! Some places are better for summer sipping than others.

Like, duh, if the sun is shining and we're getting cheap drinks, the only thing that will make that better is being outside, surrounded by fun activities, pretty girls and boys with their shirts off and nicely tanned and oiled bodies. And if we're outside, soaking up those rays coming at us at 100+ degrees, we're going to need some alcohol in us, and make it cheap, please!

Well, some Vegas bars and lounges do just that! Here are some of our favorite Las Vegas happy hour specials...

Best Happy Hour with Outdoor Seating:

PBR Rock Bar and Grill has $5 Jager Bombs, 2-for-1 well drinks and $3 draft beers 3pm-6pm every day. Enjoy it on their outdoor patio - seriously, it's summer - or stay inside to watch sports on the tube. Whatever works for you. 

Margaritas, anyone?

Pink Taco: Not one, but two happy hours?! We like that. During the week, their first happy hour is from 4-7pm. You can get 1/2 price appetizers and 2-for-1 drinks. Opt for the margaritas - you are in a Mexican restaurant after all! The second round of these Las Vegas happy hour deals starts at 9pm. You get all the same deals, PLUS you can add $2 tacos to the mix.

Yolos at Planet Hollywood Vegas has $5 margaritas, house wines and well drinks Monday-Thursday from 2-5. Hungry too? There's $5 taquitos, flautas, tacos and quesadillas.

Carlos n' Charlies has 2-for-1 margaritas every day from 2-6, several flavors and two different sizes (regular and big mama) We personally like big mama's, especially if there's tequila in her.

For a Cold Brew:

Chicago Brewing Co. hosts happy hour from 4-7pm, and offers $2.50 micro brews and $6 pitchers. There are other daily specials on brews and foods, plus a late-night happy hour from 10 to midnight with $2 draft beers, half-priced wines and half priced well drinks and appetizers. 

All You Can Drink?

You'll definitely want to check out Blondies at Planet Hollywood. For $20, you can drink as much as you want from 3-6pm. 

Summer is for Sangria!

And after a few pitchers of it, we'll be 'sangrian' all night! (We don't know what that means, but let's face it, we'll probably do that.) And we can at Firefly on Paradise Rd., because during happy hour from 3-6 (Monday-Thursday, and 3-5 on Fridays) they have sangria pitchers for $12.00. Unlike many pitchers, these account for about 6 glasses poured out. Yum! Brews like Fat Tire and more are $2.50 (0r less!)

(Tip: Sit at the bar and you'll get complimentary tapas, like a bacon wrapped date, potato and egg tortilla and meatballs. Hungry? They have a full menu of tapas. Yummy, but there's still enough room for beer... and a 4th pitcher of sangria perhaps!)

Real Cheapo Status Vegas Happy Hours:

Double Down Saloon: All drinks are $2, Monday-Friday from noon to 5pm (Yep, even their famous Ass Juice!)

Triple 7: $1.50 micro brews from 4-7, $1 brews from midnight to 7am

Grab a brew, a margarita or some sweet sangria when you're celebrating your summer in Las Vegas, and you'll definitely be feeling a little happier. Especially when you can get them at these prices. Let us know what your favorite Vegas happy hour is, and if you haven't found one yet, maybe give a few (or all) of the ones on this list a go.